all i want.

i don't know how to unlove.

the obvious solution is to learn to love more freely.

i need to make a list of things that make me happy. like sitting on the internets, reading /ck/ and learning how to cook. like little smiles from girls i love. like canned mocha nescafé. like angel when, on being kissed goodbye on the forehead while sleeping, wakes up and pulls me close so i can't leave the house without being hugged.

if i had my way the laws of physics would be such that every time someone experiences something that makes them happy they would be forced to do a little jig.

being happy makes me happy. it feels like being loved by a ghost.

i still love nicole, very much. but in a good way this time.